Thursday, June 24, 2010

Miztrezboo Week 7 Entry: Happy People, Stupid People


miztrezboo's Choice: Both

Happy People, Stupid People.

"The stars at night - are big and bright,"

clap - clap - clap - clap

"Deep in the heaart of Texas!"

"Jasper. Do you think-"

His rough, deep tenor only got louder.

"The prairie sky - is big and wide,"

clap - clap - clap - clap

"Deep in the heaaart of Texas!"

"Seriously, Jasper I-"

"The sage in bloom - smells like perfume,"

clap - clap - clap - clap

"Deep in the heaaart of Texas!"

"Jasper, I wanted to tal-"

"Reminds me of," He curled onto his side, those sky blue eyes dancing like white fire in the bright light of the lamp behind our heads. One long, slightly gnarled looking finger met my skin, trailing softly down my nose and traced over my lips.

"The one I love." He whispered the last words and I felt my breath stutter in my chest as he leaned in, those fire eyes locked on mine. My heart pounded in my ears to a completely new staccato. Jasper's large, calloused hand cupped my cheek and I imagined I could feel every hardened line of flesh from the hours he spent with hammer and saw fitting out kitchens.

My tongue poked out to wet my lips in anticipation. This was what I wanted. This was what I dreamed about. This was what I had hoped would happen the moment he asked me to come sleep by him on our Church's summer 'singles' camp out. From the moment I'd seen him swagger into Choir practice three months ago, I felt it.

The 'it' that people had been talking about all my life. The 'it' that my best friend Alice had with her Emmett. The 'it' thing that my step sister had with Edward Cullen.

The 'it' thing you saw in movies. That big love moment. I had it with Jasper Whitlock.

Now maybe, if his words and his actions and the cute dimpled smile he'd thrown my way all afternoon when we'd been out swimming in the river were anything to go by.

Maybe Jasper was having an 'it' moment too.

The tip of his nose brushed mine and I felt his thumb brush slowly across my cheek from where he had threaded his fingers through my hair. Surely the whole world had frozen as if a giant pause button had been hit. Maybe the earth slowed silent on its axis.

I could feel his breath on my face, that warm smell of the cocoa and raisin bread we'd had for supper. Being this close, every breath I took was Jasper. The food we'd shared, the sweet smoke from the fire he'd helped build, and on top of that - that purely man smell that always surrounded him.

He was so sexy.

"Deep in the heaaaart of Texas!"

He grinned and my hand met his cheek with a resounding slap.

"Aw, Leah what was that for!"

"That?" I pushed at his chest, attempting to stand and tripping in the blankets I'd wound around myself as the night had turned cooler.

"You.. I! Just... gah!" I stormed off, leaving him rubbing his jaw, those stupid golden curls of his bobbed around his head. I stomped my way down to the creek bed, the dry earth under my feet crunching with every step. The noise was loud in the unearthly quiet that surrounded the camp at this hour of night. Nearly everyone was bed down, talking quietly with the people they'd decided to camp near.

Jasper was probably keeping them up with that stupid song of his anyway. He called out again and so did another familiar voice, but there was no way I was turning around for Jacob Black or the idiot that had me walking off into the dark in the first place.


This was why I'd sworn off them.

This was why I told myself I wouldn't fall in love again. Wouldn't risk my heart.

But then he had to go and walk into our church.

Stupid Alice and her stupid ideas.

"Oh Lee-Lee, you deserve happiness, babe!"

Stupid happy people only wanting everyone around them to feel the same.

I had been happy. I had my job, I had my friends, I had my goldfish for company when I came home.

"Leah, don't you want to have someone to dance with at my wedding?"

Ugh, and then there was stupid Bella and her stupid wedding to her stupid college sweetheart.

Stupid, stupid happy people.

Stupid, stupid me thinking I could be one of them.

I threw the blanket I'd brought with me onto the pebbles that lined the edge of the river and lay down. I'd wandered far enough away from the main camping ground that I was surrounded in dark, inky night. The black was all encompasing until I lay down and looked at the stars above.


If there was one thing I could count on in my life. It was the heavens above. The bright white and blues, the flickering reds and occasional yellows that made up the solar system and reminded me of just how small and insignificant my problems were when I thought they were anything but. When my ex-fiance and ex-best friend were killed a week before our wedding in a freak car accident. I had thought I'd never breathe again. Then when I found out that they'd actually been eloping themselves - somehow having hidden their burgeoning relationship - my sorrow turned to hurt and anger.

To top it all off, she'd been pregnant with his kid.

The reason we needed to keep having her dress altered nothing to do with 'a glandular' problem at all.

That was when things got dark for me. When I actually spent more time out under the stars - watching through teary eyes as they blurred more and more with every pull of vodka that ran its way through my system. I'd stare at these same stars, these constellations above and wish for answers. Curse them for not giving me any.

The stars. They were my constant. They glittered and glowed and never really changed at all.

They were, how I should be.

Cold. Closed off. Alone.

Nobody that lives that way gets hurt.


I said nothing. I didn't want to talk. Not anymore. I was too busy staring at the night sky and focusing on being just like the stars were. Lone travelers, that depended on no one, and nothing but themselves.

"Leah? Ow! Oh fuck me," I heard a stumble and what sounded like a foot meeting with one of the larger boulders.

Then the voice was closer, a dark shape in the already murky landscape.

A body that I would know anywhere, night or not.

"What do you want, Jasper?"

I saw him moving closer, using my voice as a guide.

"I'm, ouch, why didn't I grab my shoes.. I just wanted to make sure you were okay."

He finally was in arms distance, and I reached out and tapped his leg.

The scream that filled the air was unearthly and I could only imagine how red Jasper's cheeks were as he called back to the main camp that we were alright.

I was laughing so hard I didn't even have the heart to be annoyed that he made out the shriek was mine not his.

Jasper nudged my shoulder as he lay down beside me after I shuffled to give him space. I was still chuckling, tiny snorts and gasps of breath as he felt him turn on his side, one of those large fingers of his poking my arm.

"It wasn't that funny,"

I rolled over to face him, the moon having come out from behind the clouds enough so I could see his profile. Even this annoyed with him, I could still see everything that I liked about him in the first place. The crinkles around his eyes from his wide smile. The dimple in his cheek quirking as he tried not to give into the giggles that I was still suffering from. His crazy curls lying haphazardly around his face.

He was so beautiful. Handsome even.

"I beg to differ, but anyway. I'm not even talking to you."

His brow lifted, "And why would that be?"

I pressed my lips together tight, obviously he had forgotten that not talking to him meant that I wouldn't be answering any questions.

"Oh, right. So I'm going to have to guess." He sighed, the night creatures playing a loud crescendo around us. "I'm sorry about before. I didn't mean to upset you."

I blinked and didn't say a word.

I felt Jasper's hand reach out, tucking a few flyaway strands of hair behind my ear before his fingers - featherlight - traced down the line of my jaw. His thumb and forefinger gripped my chin, tilting my head up towards his.

"I just didn't know if you'd let me do this or not. But seeing how upset you got because I didn't, I'm guessing that you wanted me to."

His tongue peeked out, running quickly across that plush bottom lip and I felt mine do the same.

There was no quiet this time. There was plenty of noise the second time his lips moved toward mine. My blood rushing in my ears, the sound of the river running over every rock, his chest moving in and out under my palm as I reached out to touch him - making sure all of this was real.

And the kiss.

Well let's just say, we didn't stop at one.


*Lyrics taken from Deep In The Heart of Texas as sung by Gene Autry*